trouble-advice needed
 

A VW Jetta Wagon 04. 46K miles. Doesn't pass inspection at local lube placefor emissions. (Faulty Catalytic converter had been replaced by dealerat 22K miles by VW.) Took it to dealer. They say it's the exhaust gasket blew out, needed to be replaced. They did it. At 51k miles the oil light comes on, then engine light. Oil checked by service station -- says actually the oil is okay, its the coolant down a gallon.They top it off. Another 75 miles, returning from airport, the oil light comes on-- a few miles from home, drive 3 miles with light on, car stalls at stop sign, won't restart. Car towed to VW -- they say it engine shot, needed oil change, last one was at 41k. Oil had been added over time. Oil was checked. They had the car at 46k adn never said "you need an oil change" though they now claim we should have changed oil every 3k. We point out they had the car for an unknown (by us) problemand never pointed out what it needed (car is leased from dealer). Want us to buy new or used engine.

Research on mycarstats.com shows real problems with Jetta engine coolant. Any way that affected this situation?

Any shared responsibility on dealer's part? Am i just f***ed?

Thanks